Most mornings I pass the King Richard III statue, I live and work in Leicester England. King Richard lived under a car park for many years until a phenomenal insight that led to his discovery. My working life is a consistent curiosity into how the past impacts our lives.
The past can affect us in many ways, sometimes positively other times negatively and as a Hypnotherapist; it is common practice for me to spend time exploring people’s early years, to help them make changes in their current lives.
Our past can be frightening, and some of us understandably do not want to revisit old painful times and memories. I fully appreciate this, with regards to how I felt about my own painful memories and my unconscious avoidance towards dealing with them. There comes a time, however, when it is necessary to do something about it, usually when we become aware of the havoc our past is causing in our daily lives. Here are a couple of examples:
- Those who have been cheated on by their first love, despite it happening many years ago, can still be haunted by this old memory in the current life. Despite being in a different relationship, with a different person. Those old feelings continue to dominate their thinking, leaving them feeling insecure, and fearful that at some point they will lose their loved one, as they did in the past. (They never really got over that first painful experience at an unconscious level)
- Those who were bullied at school may still experience bullying relationships in their adult lives, or expect to be bullied, so avoid social interaction. (They never really got over that first painful experience at an unconscious level)
These early experiences can act like templates, for which we unconsciously act out in our lives. As we spend so much time trying to deal with the here and now, or merely getting on with our everyday lives, we are often unable to see the patterns in our lives and how they link back to those painful early experiences.
Many people associate therapy with having to re-live these painful experiences. I personally do not see the value in this, and you have already lived through them once, why would I want to impose that on anyone again?
I recall having to deal with some painful memories of my own. I had avoided them for long enough and knew I had to do something, but it was the “something” which really scared me. I was afraid that someone would make me talk endlessly about horrible things, which would make me cry a lot and relive that old pain. Fortunately, my experience wasn’t like this, it was simple, empowering and liberating. My life has transformed as a result of this.
Over the years, I have researched and experimented with various approaches to dealing with past memories, I can quite confidently admit, I am rather good at it. I am able to help people let go of painful emotions and rearrange the way they view those old memories. I do this in a fast and effective way without rushing or being disrespectful to the person’s early experience.
Clients are amazed at how easy it is, and how quickly they feel different in a positive way.
So, back to King Richard III, for a long time, many people viewed him as a villainous man. With new information coming to light, we are able to view him in a new way.
You can make changes to the way you view your life in a way which makes you feel in control, empowered and able to enjoy your life. If experiences from the past still haunt you, fear not, this can change, and you will find the freedom and space to really enjoy being you.